The Lone Wolf.
Dear Young Man, when choosing a woman, endeavour you go for someone who has a mind of their own.
Avoid people who cannot make a single decision without involving cliques and communities.
Avoid people who are easily influenced by others.
Avoid people without a spine.
Love, relationships and marriage is tough. And you need a tough partner.
The reason many marriages break is usually due to external factors - ‘friends’ and ‘advisers’ whispering in the ears of the couple to abandon ship.
When relationships and marriages encounter turbulence, as they should, how that conflict is navigated can make or mar the union.
A solid couple should be able to navigate their turbulence within themselves, with absent to minimal external influences, and tons of maturity.
If you run outside to badmouth your partner at the slightest infraction before other people, it becomes harder to mend the issues as you’ll need to go back and explain to your ‘advisers’ why you are going back to this person you’ve just painted as ‘toxic’ and ‘devil incarnate’.
So many will leave, just to save face.
And a simple problem, handled poorly, becomes a nail on the coffin of the union.
Learn how to manage conflicts and put out fires before they become a conflagration.
People who enjoy their own company are likely to be more loyal and faithful.
They are internally validated, confident in themselves and do not need applause to know that they are valuable.
There are guys who cannot stay in a hotel for weeks without craving company.
While there is nothing wrong in craving company, the wrong kind of company will derail you.
Maturity is becoming comfortable in your own skin, staying true to your commitments and enjoying your own company, even for long stretches of time.
You can be alone but not lonely.
And success of requires long periods spent alone in hard work - often years of sowing blood, sweat and tears to build the life of your dreams.
Don’t be afraid of being a lone wolf.
And when you find another beautiful and sensible lone wolf that buys into your vision, both of you can make a pack - and do life together.